We have a crack dealer in our neighborhood. He lurks around every afternoon between 6 and 8. I know when he's coming. I watch him from my window at times. Waiting to see if he'll have the nerve to stop in front of my house.
He is vile. He is persistent. He is pure fucking evil.
We call him...The Ice Cream Man.
And when Cristian hears the tinny sound of Pop Goes The Weasel, I swear he starts twitching and shaking. It's like the sound of a weepy siren...the whistle of the pied piper...or a fucking banshee on the prowl. I rarely allow Cris the opportunity to partake of his frozen treats of sin. In fact, I stock the freezer with ice cream and popsicles just to outwit the bastard, if nothing else.
Well...that and we ALL know how Roy loves him some popsicles. Heh.
I hate the Ice Cream Man. More than I hate the guy on the corner who put a hot dog stand in his yard. And that is some pure freaking hate, people.
I have one thing to say to that man who drives around my 'hood blasting shitty nursery rhymes from his converted van and pushing frozen sugared goodness on the innocent street urchins wandering down my humble street.
FEAR ME.
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It's My World. I Make The Rules. And Break The Rules.
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About Me
- Cece Martinez
- I love cupcakes, Hello Kitty, mustache mugs, fantasy fiction, pop culture, alt music and blue collar coffee. I dislike country music. With a passion.
10 comments:
does he sell pickles? Im sure he does. they are required to by the United Federation of Guys Who Put Stickers And Popsicle Porno All Over Their Second Hand Mail Trucks.
Robert may I say...that you FUCKING ROCK.
When are you coming down again for a visit?
So Cece what are you really going to do? Feed him broken glass? Give him chinese water drop torture? Bust a few shots at him from your gat? Or just give him a grimace and shake your fist from the safety of your home?
Cody- I'm going to hire you to take him out, of course.
With your bottle rocket launcher.
Don't make me pinch your cheeks!
The sound of the ice cream man used to be magic for me, growing up. Loved it. Now, it's a huge annoyance. Find a new soundtrack, I say.
i have good memories of the ice cream truck.
i love those strawberry shortcake thingies... mmm
GODDAMNIT!!!
Now I want some fucking ice cream!
we all fear you...
Jeremy- Yeah something a little more hard core. Like System of the Down.
Grace- EVIL. Don't fall victim.
Mike- I'm terribly sorry Mike but Camelback will never accept you with a belly full of ice crack...I MEAN ice cream.
I have no idea when I'm coming back down there. Im still not working, so maybe soon. I would like to hit up the beach.
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