Friday, July 15, 2005

Emily, You Bitch

Next weekend Roy is taking me to South Padre Island for the ENTIRE WEEKEND. A whole TWO DAYS and TWO NIGHTS with NO KIDS. Talk about an orgy of sand and sex and decadence. He rented a condo and we plan on spending Saturday at Schlitterbahn and eating at the Shrimp Haus where you can eat shrimp any of 100 different ways. I think this is the part that Roy is most looking forward to.
The shrimp part.
Sunday will be a leisurly day spent on the beach and Monday we're both off of work so we can spend the day being lazy asses.
Plans have been made...arrangements set...MY LIFE AS I KNOW IT HAS BEEN ALTERED...and now this.
This? Yes, this. This bitch Emily decides to roll into town. And according to the computer model, her snaky tendrils of doom are heading straight for MY vacation destination.
THE AUDACITY. The utter nerve of her.
If I go by the red model, she is nose-diving straight into what I lovingly refer to as the butthole of Texas...Brownsville.
There goes my sand. There goes my beach sex. There goes my shrimp orgy.
There goes my hour long ride on the Schlitterbahn Rio Aventura.
This sucks so bad.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

now you know how we here in brevard county felt THREE times in 6 or 7 weeks last year!

but that does suck :( the shrimp orgy sounds good.

Big Heavy said...

well, at least this way, you'll have the whole place to yourselves.

Cody said...

who the hell is emily?

Cece Martinez said...

Cody- Thats the name of the fucking hurricane. You are such a nut.

Big Heavy- Yeah. ALL to ourselves. Maybe we can loot the place.

Manan- Yeah thanks for your sympathy! Heh.

Roberto Campana said...

dont worry cody, i said the same thing. emily? is that a old gf? hehe.

and ewww! cece, u wanted me to go down there and have some drinks with you two while on your sex weekend?? then again, knowing you two, that's just about every weekend. you rabbits you!!

grace said...

awww... goddamned emily.

maybe it'll be okay by next weekend???