Workin' Girl

Work, Shmirk.

I was out sick yesterday so you would think I have plenty to do. And I do, rest assured. When I arrived there was a $600,000 order sitting in front of my desk. Three boxes full of pacemakers and defibs. I wonder what the commission was on that one. I shoved it out of my way and sat down. I poured myself a nice hot cup of my own coffee. 4 scoops of regular and 1 scoop of Chocolate Raspberry to create 6 cups of caffienated orgasmic delight. AAAAH. All mine. I added 3 sugar packets and 1 International Delights French Vanilla creamer. Ready to work? Not quite. Tralala!
I move the 3 implant orders over to the other side of my desk. You'll thank me the day you get a Medtronic Kappa DR Pacemaker and the $5,000 bill is delayed because I haven't entered the purchase order yet. Emily from Accounting is all over my ass BUT I DO IT FOR YOU, PEOPLE. I DO IT FOR YOU. Okay, not really. I do it for me.
Hmmm. What's this? Filing? Kiss my ass. I hate filing. I'm still working on this cup of coffee and it requires every bit of my attention. I like strong coffee, with a bit of sweetness. Kind of how I like my men. Heh.
The guy who sits behind me was out yesterday too. He was in a car accident. His face is all busted up. In fact he has...hang on...let me count them...4 staples in his skull. Yeah I just got up and counted the staples on his head but he's on the phone and he knows I'm weird so...
Anyway, makes my 24 hr stomach flu seem pretty insignificant.
My weekend basically sucked. Roy worked Saturday, Sunday and Monday. We hung out at my mother in laws house Friday night and Saturday night. The usual menagerie of Drunken Martinez Siblings abounded. It's cool. They're ten times as funny when they're drinking and that says alot because they're pretty freaking funny without drinking. My brother in law, Joe was talking about making porn with my sister in law, Joyce and when she walked back outside and overheard our conversation, I thought she was going to kill him. They crack me up. Then I found out that one of my nephews is already having sex. OH THE HORROR. And one of my other nephews has a girlfriend. I caught him in the kitchen while making a beer delivery...

I heard you got a girlfriend.

Yeah.

Is she dumb?

No. She's pretty smart.

Thats all I needed to know.

Okay.

On Sunday night we went to see War Of The Worlds and it was pretty good...despite my recent distaste for Tom Cruise. On Monday night Roy and I sat on the front bench and watched Cris light some pretty benign fireworks. It was quite boring. Then our neighbors came home. Roy pointed out that on New Year's Eve..."They almost blew the roof off their damn house." And he's right. They're hard core. I'm just glad Miko didn't wake up when they lit those Black Cats in that big bucket.
Bastards.
What a wasted weekend. I feel totally cheated. And I finished my coffee. I guess that means it's time to stop loafing around and earn my keep. DRAT.