Foot Sandwich

I feel horribly guilty about something. I went to the bank during lunch and I was behind only one car in line. This car was taking FOREVER and I was starting to think really evil, malevolent thoughts about the occupants of this car. Things like...
"Stupid GIRLS!"
"Hurry up, Mexicans!"
"I wonder if I can kill her with my eye daggers."
"How many transactions are you MAKING?!"
"BITCH!"
And then all three girls turned around and waved at me. It was a car full of my co-workers. The same ones who had just invited me to lunch with them. Ouch. But that isn't quite as good as what I did yesterday.
Another co-worker had been nagging me all morning about checking on something so I finally got tired of him and called one of my other co-workers on his radio.
He responded..."Yeah?"
And I said, "Hey, 'so and so' keeps BUGGING me about 'blah blah blah'. Do you know what he's TALKING about?!"
And then I heard..."Guess what. It's me."
And I choked. I had called the wrong co-worker. I had called the guy who had been bugging me! And now he knew that HE WAS SERIOUSLY IRRITATING ME. I was all like, "Peep." So I just told him that I was trying to get a hold of the other guy and disconnected like a fool. Which I am. I apologized later for that, but DANGIT I need to learn to shut my big mouth.
Oh, and it might help if I stop thinking like a big mean bitch too.